My hospital room was filled with flowers.
As if they were meant for a final farewell.
—But I had no intention of ending my story there.
｜The Unspoken Truth Behind the Flowers
Every time my friends visited, they hesitated.
What should they say?
What words wouldn’t hurt me?
Somewhere deep down, they all knew—
this could be the last time they saw me.
So instead of words, they brought flowers.
Eventually, my room was overflowing with them.
It looked less like a hospital…
and more like a birthday celebration for someone about to disappear.
When I was too weak to move,
others would quietly change the water in the vases.
Among them was a woman in her seventies.
｜The Words That Became My Promise
On the day she was discharged,
she held my hand tightly and said:
“I finally finished taking care of my family.
My children are independent now.
I thought I could finally live my own life.
And then they told me… it’s terminal cancer.
Can you believe that?”
She laughed. But there was pain behind it.
Then she looked straight at me.
“But you’re different.
You live in a time where you can choose your life.
Live the life I couldn’t live.
I believe you can.”
Those words never left me.
They became a promise.
｜I Decided I Would Not Just Survive
That day, I made a decision.
No matter what happens to me.
No matter how I look, or how broken I become.
—I will live.
And as long as I live,
I will choose my life.
｜I Chose to Redesign My Life—Not Just Return to It
After surgery and chemotherapy,
I spent three months recovering at home.
Logically, I should have gone back to work.
But I didn’t.
Instead, I made a different choice.
To study again.
There were practical reasons—
regular hospital visits, fear of recurrence,
the reality of starting a new job while still fragile.
But the real reason was something else.
A question we often asked each other in the hospital:
“What would you do if you could start your life over?”
｜People Reveal Their Truth at the Edge
“I want to study French literature at the Sorbonne.”
“I want to return to music school and sing opera again.”
These weren’t dreams people casually shared.
They came from somewhere deeper.
Everyone there was intelligent, cultured—
people I might have learned so much from,
if we had met under different circumstances.
That’s when I realized:
People discover their truth at the edge of life.
And I didn’t want to ignore mine.
｜Words Can Break You. Words Can Save You
I was hurt by words.
“You can’t have children? Then what’s your value?”
“If you lose your uterus, are you still a woman?”
Some said these things casually.
As if they meant nothing.
But they stayed with me.
And yet—
words also saved me.
Like hers.
That’s why I chose to study language.
｜Learning Became My Second Beginning
I studied media and language expression,
learning from professionals in journalism and broadcasting.
And in 2004, I published my first book:
“A Smile That Suits You Beautifully.”
Before I knew it, the book went into reprint,
and was selected by my publisher for exhibition at the Library Fair,
as well as nominated for the Japan Essayist Club Award.
My book began traveling to places I had never been.
As if it had a life of its own.
｜Starting Over Where I Once Lost Everything
After graduation, I returned to full-time work.
And the place I worked—
was Shinjuku Island Tower.
The same place where I had once collapsed,
covered in blood, and was taken away by ambulance.
This time, I stood there as someone working.
Life is strange like that.
｜People Rebuild People
My life didn’t change because of work alone.
There was someone else.
A creative director in the company.
Brilliant. Accomplished.
And yet, worn down by the very organization she belonged to.
We became close.
Birthdays, timing, coincidences—
everything aligned naturally.
She visited New York every year.
“There’s something about that city,” she told me.
“Every time I go, I feel alive again. Inspired.”
At the time, I only traveled to Europe.
New York wasn’t even on my list.
Then she said:
“You should go. Just once.”
Something about those words stayed with me.
So I went.
And I understood immediately.
A city where a woman could walk alone, freely.
Energy. Diversity. Possibility.
And a strange feeling—
like something inside me was waking up.
I didn’t know it yet.
But that moment
would change the course of my life.
｜A Career Can Be Rebuilt—Stronger Than Before
I started as a temporary employee.
And then—
I became a full-time employee.
Out of more than 30 applicants,
I was chosen for a reason that had nothing to do with
my academic background or technical skills.
“If you join us, this team will become stronger.”
That one sentence changed my life.
Over time, I built my career in HR and administration—
recruitment, training, evaluation, operations.
Eventually,
I gained seven years of experience in a global company,
and later advanced into HR at an international organization.
This wasn’t luck.
It was intentional.
I built my career like a double major—
so that no matter what happened,
I would always have a way forward.
｜You Can Choose Your Life—Again and Again
My life stopped once.
But I moved again.
I studied.
I worked.
I rebuilt everything.
So I know this for sure.
You can start over.
No—
you can choose again.
｜What Quality of Life Truly Means
I used to ask myself one question:
“If I only had one year left, what would I choose?”
That question became my compass.
Quality of Life isn’t about what you have.
It’s about what you choose.
｜3 Principles of Quality of Life
- You can redesign your life at any point
- A career can always be rebuilt
- Your choices define your life
【Conclusion】
I am still living the promise I made that day.
“You can choose your life.”
Now, I want to pass those words on to you.
—You can begin again.
—And you can choose your life.
【Next Chapter】
Next: New York.
Where my life begins to move once again.
